Stationary objects are apparently imperilling Scotch cops as they go about their driving duties - causing damage costing hundreds of thousands of pounds.
According to the Scottish Daily Record, police have run afoul of trees, rocks and stationary cars since January 2008, in a litany of crashes that involved neither people nor other moving vehicles.
Obtained through a Freedom of Information (FOI) request, the figures show that only "a small minority" of these crashes actually occurred on 999 calls, the paper says, while "few" of the officers involved have received any punishment for their errors.
Strathclyde Police - who cover "Glasgow's lively urban areas" and are Scotland's largest force - racked up more than 1,200 damaged vehicles, costing the better part of three-quarters of a million pounds. Although 451 drivers were found to be at fault, none were fined, reprimanded or suspended.
Meanwhile Lothian and Borders Police admitted that the main cause of their 167 damaged vehicles was hitting "still objects", and Tayside Police that "reversing incidents" were the most prevalent cause of their 133 prangs.
The news comes as it was revealed by the Scottish Daily Record that two of Strathclyde Police's officers had to swim to safety following a late-night canal crash near Glasgow.
A resident observed that householders who rushed to the scene initially thought that a joyrider had dumped the car in the drink, but it became evident that the rightful driver had simply made "a real howler of an error".
"These people are meant to be advanced drivers but this was a real Mr Magoo job," he added.
